Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
