party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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