honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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