it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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