i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
