Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
