what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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