How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize