No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Farmville is her only friend.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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