I smell stomach acid.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
