I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
