can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
