I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
