Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
