The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
