My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
