My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I want to be your penis for a week.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Randomize
