i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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