I think I am morally bankrupt
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Randomize
