remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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