I wanna passion pit in your ass
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
