I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
