You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I need to sanitize my soul.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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