Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize
