dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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