She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
