I wannas sexs uuuuu
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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