Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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