whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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