Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
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