Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
