Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
