Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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