so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize