i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I want a musical about memes.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
