I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
