R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
