No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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