The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
