There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
