ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
