He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
