i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
