ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
