This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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