Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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