found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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