What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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