Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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