And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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